Trial..

today is da fourth day of trial.. i get to online at last.. but nothing much i can do going online except updating tis..

ahh well... to be truthful.. i din study much for my trial.. except history.. i started 1 month before da trials but i was in slow pace... but i cant answer da sejarah paper... damn.. wad use i read... my mum reprimanded me for my study habit.. taking da book n jus read... she said i shud do exercise.. make mind maps.. copy down da notes.. i suppose its true cos i don quite rmb all those facts i studied.. n i get them mixed up... haiz... guess i ll have to get moving after da trials... god please force me to study!!!

now lets get to da trials.. first day was BM... da day before.. sunday.. wasnt a good day... morning as usual i went for tt... den normally i would go home n get my lunch while wathcing tv den i could get to sleep... but tat day my parents brought my bro n i to have lunch.. ahh.. kinda like a waste of time for me.. i'd rather da bao n eat at home... eating time.. my dad suddenly gave me lectures... arrgh.. im already so tired n now making me even worse... n dad met up a fren n dey talked talked n my mum n bro n i had to wait till they finish.. damn it... so we got home.. so i got to bed... den at night my mum told me to get ready to go for a dinner... WTH... tmr exam today still go out dinner.. i din wanna go... n get scolded n forced to go... it wasnt any big dinner.. jus a small dinner with relatives.. jus becos my cousin moved to another house n im required to go for dinner... arrggh.. i jus get scolded cos i said i wanna study at home... n they jus scold me cos i din prepare earlier..n shud relax da day before exam.. man.. out of 10 ppl.. i don think theres nobody who wouldnt study before a exam day...

n so monday came.. BM paper.. well cant say my BM is very good n cant say very bad.. im jus above average... well.. my brain is full of rust.. after so long nvr write essay.. cos of lazy... laziness kills... i took 30 mins to figure out which essay to write.. n so i choose a not so popular question.. points keep getting to my head.. but i dont know whether i ran out of topic anot... i jus don feel good when doing da essay.. but its already too late.. cant change adi.. haiz.. jus din care.. n i spent last 25 mins on da short essay... i bet i wont get any high marks from tat.. i din go for recess.. din feel like going.. paper 2 after tat... da novel n komsas stuffs.. i din study... so cant answer real well... jus blowing water.. hope i don get my marks minused too much.. tatabahasa is much worse.. out of 3 peribahasa.. i got 2 wrong i think.. haiz... i ponteng taekwondo.. haiz..

well its 2nd day... english n history 1.. well nothing much to say in english p2 but in p1... well i did not use da plot i used to use... jus don feel like using it.. so i wrote an essay i read before... i took quite a long time to figure out wad to write too... haiz.. so i wrote about a gang of frenz went for a treasure hunt but wads in da treasure was lingerie.. n da story jus ended with ''with hope, we look forward to another new day'' its da question... well hope Mr. Bala accepts tis... hes quite a fussy person... haiz.. pls dont fail my essay... history p1.. cant say very hard.. n not very easy too.. maybe i did study gua.. jus rmb some n don rmb some.. da study not firm enuf.. some questions don know hwo to answer.. hope i don get too much wrongs.

3rd day... history p2 n moral.. haiz.. i cant answer da history.. mixed up facts.. don rmb... damn it... especially essay part.. i totally wrote other facts.. its da PBB (UN) thing.. damn.. mixed it with OIC.. i think i wont get any high marks from da essay part.. mostly i jus blow water... haiz.. hope i get a B at least... i don wan get C adi... well moral... last time moral was a total disaster to me.. i don memorize da facts.. thsoe definition of da nilai.. but now thanks to tuition by Mr.Subra.. i get to learn da technique n i jus have to memorize da ciri-ciri. which i did it in jus 1 n half hours... all my tt proved useful cos i was confident with my answers.. but overconfidence made me got one ciri wrong in da essay so i lost 2 marks as far as i know adi.. hoping to get 90+. hehe.. quite a high hope.

well today is fourth day.. maths n chinese.. maths was easy.. i did all da questions.. including all da questions in B part which required only 4 answers n i gave da teacher 5 answers.. so it came to chinese.. my weakest subject.. well tis time is quite hard i think.. cos i cant answer most of da question.. i don und da passage.. everything i dont know.. i kinda gave up adi.. n i think im gonna fail... hope i wont.. pray for my essay...

haiz.. i've been getting reprimand lectures these few days... my mum.. happen to meet a woman whose son is my ex-classmate.. a bright student.. n i dunno how my mother heard how he study.. etc etc stuffs.. how hardworking.. so i get compared with tat guy... ppl is so hardworking.. always go for tt... get good results.. everyday also study.. n wad do i do.. my mum asks me.. damn.. ask me to learn from him.. y don she jus ask me to be Einstein... haiz.. y does my mum always compare me with other ppl... only studies she compares.. nothing else.. i know i don excel in any other stuffs but at least im better den those study nerds... y cant she say sports... music.. she doesnt realise any good in me at all... only knows how to condemn.. i get all these comments everyday.. its really stressful... my own mother who compares me with other children... it feels like they arent proud tat im their son...

mum n dad have been discussing my future.. i accidently heard when i came down to get a drink.. my dad have been saying tat im useless to study anymore.. my results are like shit to him... he nvr cares wad i get.. he jus wants 90+ n 100 if i get 90+... hes a man of perfection... cant bear with him... i get hard lectures.. everything discourages me... everything my parents says.. am i really tat bad in studies... izzit really ST exams tat hard... i always thought tat way n i always tell them its like tat.. n dey jus ignore n scold me for giving out reasons... i really dont know which one is true... m i really tat bad or its standard too high prob... haiz... i want to get 10As... i want them... i seriously need them.. if not i'll be doomed...